So, if you’ve been stuck up on the fence, unable to make a decision, paralyzed and afraid to take the jump toward your happiness, I am zooming in today to help you. Today is the day that we will work on making plans and making the decision to get off the fence!
So, how does a person do that?
Here are the 5 Steps To Get Off The Fence. It’s time to make a plan to get happy and making progress in life!
Step 1 — Determine Where You’re Stuck
The first step to get off the fence and live a fulfilling existence, is self-awareness. You have to figure out where you’re blocked, stuck or not making progress. This takes time alone, and the ability to be still and quiet to think about where you are not happy. Exercises such as making two lists: One list called “CHANGES/IMPROVEMENTS I WANT TO MAKE”, and the other list is called the “OFF THE FENCE/HAPPINESS ACTION PLAN”. So, for example, if you want to start your own business, on the left hand side, you would write, “Start my own business,” and on the right hand side, it would read, “Moonlight my start-up on the side, working ninety minutes at night and four hours on the weekends until I am making some money and can quit my day-job to focus on my business full time.”
The trick is, the more detailed your two lists are, the better. Post your list in a visible spot. It holds you accountable, and keeps your eye on the prize.
Step 2 — Commit to Doing the Work
Know that nothing will work unless you do. One of my mentors says, “Nobody ever drowned in their own sweat.” It was something that really sunk in and always stuck with me. I believe and and taught my kids that “hard work is always rewarded”. Happiness doesn’t come without a commitment to happiness. Without work. Your happiness is a choice. You getting what you want out of life is YOUR DECISION. And the same holds true for your unhappiness. So, commit to doing the work. Whatever your goals are, commit to hustling to make them happen.
Know that sitting perched on the fence is paralysis. To live stuck is like residing in purgatory. Most people stay stuck because it’s a comfortable place to not have to commit and see something through. But you can’t manifest your highest self without making a decision, no matter how small. It’s about that first baby step. You MUST take it. If you are having a hard time moving forward, consider hiring a private coach to help you! For heaven sakes, take action!
Step 3 — Expand Your Skills
Yes. Expand your skills and commit to learning something new. Often we stay stuck and on the fence because we don’t have the skills and knowledge needed to move forward. So work at getting that knowledge and expand your skills. This could mean taking up a new hobby, enrolling in a course, volunteering, or simply giving away your expertise for free. What I mean here is, if you want to become a PAID speaker for example, speaking for free is a great way to get your name our there, and gain experience and expertise. If you want to start a consulting company, offer coaching or consulting for FREE at the beginning, both to get your feet wet, AND to build a customer base.
Expanding your skills does not only mean just enrolling in courses and acquiring new knowledge, it also means putting the current knowledge you have to work…. (ACTION!)
Step 4 — Get Out There and Meet NEW People
Commit to taking up a new hobby, volunteering, getting more involved in your community, or joining a networking group — for the purpose of meeting NEW people. We often meet the people we need once we get out there and make an effort. When you reach out to people in your network, ask for help, discuss options, then you will acquire the knowledge to help you get off the fence and move towards your goals.
If you allow yourself to just be open, and to join places like your local Community Groups, book club, sports or activity club, a writing group, traveling to live events or finding a mentor….it will naturally happen that you will meet the people who will help you move toward your goals.
Step 5 — Make More Time for the Things You Love To Do
When you do the things you love to do, it helps boost your serotonin levels (the happiness hormone), which aids in fighting depression, and other mood disorders. Doing the things you love can put you in a state of euphoria, lowering your cortisol levels (the bad hormone), which clears your mind and allows you to make good, quality decisions. For me, I love spending time with my sisters — we laugh, have fun, and it does my mind and body good. I also love spending time alone in a bookstore, working on personal development, or just perusing the aisles in an art section of a store. It calms me and regroups me. What is it for you?
When you do what you love, you are being good to yourself. You are spoiling yourself. And spoiling yourself is your right. Feeling good allows you to make clear decisions. Do it, guilt-free.
In the same token, it cannot be stressed enough the importance of the following four factors in sharpening your mind for effective and strategic decision making:
- Get a healthy amount of sleep
- Maintain an active lifestyle and get daily exercise
- Healthy nutrition and superfood to feed the body and mind
- Meditation (Spend adequate time to relax without interruption when the mind is quiet)
So my wish for all of you, is to get off the fence as soon as possible!!! it will free up your mind and allow you to move forward in life and achieve great and passionate things!!
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(Acknowledgement: ‘The 5 Steps to get off the fence” Adapted from Erica Diamond, at www.womenonthefence.com)