Your BS Story is Preventing Achievement (So Change It!)

 

The only thing between you and your goals is that BS story you keep feeling yourself as to why you can’t do it!! This is what my personal trainer told me this morning during my weighted cardio workout and she is totally right!! How many times did we make excuses and even what we believe is “good reasons” as to why we didn’t achieve our goals! Far too many! …and in fact we tell ourselves these things do many times that we actually start truly believing they are facts! Scary if you really think about it!

I have learned to recognize it when I have come up with a story… such as being too tired, having no money, not enough sleep, not enough time, telling myself I am just an emotional eater (which then somehow made it OK?), sore muscles, feet aching, sore back from a busy day at work, stress from having a 2-year old, lack of sleep, too young, too old, no good at it, not capable, can’t trust the opposite sex, don’t know how…and the story list just goes on and on and on…!!  The sad part is that we believe these things, identify with them and let them rule our lives!

I have been through all of these excuses and stories myself!  Sometimes when you come from a background of abuse, the stories can get pretty bad.  For example, you may believe you are worth nothing, are useless, not loved, not important, not worthy of love and so many more horrible things!  You can imagine, that if a person lived with those beliefs (stories) that their life would not be very good, successful or full of happiness!  I have had to work hard to overcome many of these stories.  It was not easy, but I am proof that it is totally possible to change your perception of yourself and to change how you perceive your past experiences too!

How do I work on overcoming these stories?  Keep in mind, this is always a work in progress.  My mentor (the late Jim Rohn) speaks about those stories, beliefs and thoughts and uses them as a metaphor like “weeds” growing in a garden.  This is a great metaphor because if you think about it….you cannot ignore those weeds because they will totally overtake the whole garden (weeds of the mind).  Those weeds need to be removed and even once you get the whole garden cleared out of those weeds…what happens?  YES!…those weeds keep trying to come back, so you have to continuously keep pulling out the ones that come up.

This is the same way with those stories…

Once you realize (finally gain insight into yourself) the numerous stories (lies) you have been telling yourself about why you cannot do things or achieve things…its like suddenly noticing your beautiful garden (mind) is packed solid with weeds!!  AHA!  This was definitely an AHA moment for me.  I got myself a coach and started working at getting those weeds pulled out.   It took months of work, emotional turmoil and challenging times…but, believe me, I got that darn garden mostly cleared out …out of pure determination.  However, I realized that a person has to be well-aware that those weeds (stories, lies) will keep trying to come back and keep an eye on the garden at all times to remove them once they pop up!  The lesson here was for me NOT to ignore those feelings, but rather allow them to happen, recognize them, and realize where they are coming from and correct them immediately.

Having this kind of awareness can totally change your life.  Often, to develop this awareness and clean out the garden takes extra help.  Don’t hesitate to get help with this (remember, asking for help is a sign of strength).  Once you take the time to learn this, then you will start to recognize the stories (lies) once they happen.  Once they are recognized, you can stop, identify the lie and replace it with the truth that you know is there.  Its a magical process and is definitely worth learning about!  Once you get to work on this, you will be blown away at what you are capable of achieving in your life!

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How to Change Your Fitness Mindset (And How You Will Succeed Once You Do)

The power of the mind is incredible.
The power of the mind is incredible.

Ever started on the path to fitness and then gave up?

We all have.

As a Nurse Practitioner and health coach, I see it happen all the time.

Most of the time, it has everything to do with a person’s mindset.

Our limiting beliefs about ourselves are, well, limiting. Even if we decide to get fit and pursue health, we will fail if deep down we don’t really believe we could be fit or strong. Despite our determination, our negative beliefs will undermine our efforts, and we’ll sabotage our own efforts.

Good news though!   What we believe about ourselves can be changed. Our brains are capable of creating new neural pathways and changing not only our beliefs but also behavioral patterns. It just takes work.

We have it backwards. The path to fitness doesn’t start with a strategy of when and where and how to work out. It doesn’t even start with a nutrition plan. It starts with a correct mindset – one that believes we can accomplish the health and fitness we desire.

Only once we believe we are capable of change, is it sensible to work toward that goal.

How to Change Your Mindset

First, don’t expect instant results. This thing takes time. In order to develop a fitness mindset one of the first things we have to understand is that whatever physical shape we are in today, it is the result of hundreds of small habitual actions performed throughout our life.

And we have to understand that just as we don’t get out of shape and overweight overnight, we won’t get in shape overnight either. We need to truly understand that “instant gratification” is not possible.
Most importantly, we have to understand that a fitness mindset sees life as a journey rather than a destination.

That means every failure and setback is an opportunity for growth – focus on that. We are not eating salad to fill a quota. We are not even working out to build muscles. At least, those aren’t the thing to focus on. Think of them as a byproduct of your patience, consistency, and resilience. And those qualities are grown in the face of difficulty. Embrace that, and the tough days – when you’re physically spent or emotionally worn, or all your drive and desire has dissipated like a mist – those days will seem less like drudgery and more like opportunity.

 

Practically, changing your mindset is the training of your thoughts every day. Sometimes, especially at the beginning, it’s a minute-by-minute work.

Steps to Changing Your Mindset

  • Identify the Thought You Want to Change
    We can’t change something we don’t know about. Be honest with yourself about what you really believe. Do you really, deep down, believe you can eat clean as a lifestyle for the rest of your life?  Do you really, deep down, believe you can one day become consistent at working out? What do you believe about yourself? Do you feel that you are worth it?
  • Recognize When You’re Thinking the Thought
    This is where you spy on your own brain, catching it red handed as it lies to you. Listen closely for that negative self talk. When you’re vacuuming and your mind wanders, do you hear those negative thoughts?  For example, if you don’t believe that you can ever stop snacking on sweets in the evenings, you might catch yourself thinking, “I’m an emotional eater.” The more you think these thoughts, the more they become true. Catch them in the act.
  • Replace the Thought
    Once you catch the negative self-talk in the act, stop. Stop yourself from thinking it. Refuse to indulge that lie one more time. That’s what it is – it’s a lie. Replace it with a truth – even if it’s not necessarily true right now, make your mind identify it as a truth. It is possible, to some degree, to speak things into being. If you tell your brain something over and over, it will begin to believe you. Once you believe it, your behaviour will follow. Because we act on our beliefs. We can’t help it.  Putting pen to paper and writing these beliefs and belief replacements down has been proven to be most effective.

 

Positive Replacement Thoughts

There are loads of ideas of positive replacement thoughts, or mantras as some call them. Here’s a list to kick-start your brainstorming.

My most recent ones are, “I am a gladiator!” or “I am a chiseled badass granny!”  The more I say it, the more I believe it. And the more I believe it, the more I act like it. It’s the coolest thing to be able to train our brain.

 

What limiting thoughts are keeping you from growing in health and fitness?
What positive declaration can you replace it with? (Share in the comments so I can cheer you on!)

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